We played Atlanta twice four years ago. The crowd loved us here last time. Hopefully it'll be like seeing old friends tonight. The first time we played at the Masquerade there were 700 people there and none of them decided to applaud. You could hear a pin drop. I guess the death metal crowd didn't quite get it. The second time we played at the Mid Town Music Venue. The crowd really dug us and we were rockin'. A woman came up to me with a question written on a piece of paper back then. It said something like:
"CAN YOU CONQUER YOUR OWN HATRED AND BE A LEADER FOR THOSE OF US WHO NEED A GUIDE?"
As you can imagine. We didn't hang out much. I hope she's not here tonight. Last thing I need is a Negative Zen cryptic clue stalker who's prepared to wait four years. I can imagine her pulling me from the pit and taking me back to her place. She'll hobble me and make me re-write the tour diary on the website. Atlanta punk Misery. You dirty birdy. Spare me.
The Point is a punk venue. There's a flashing early Eighties neon sign to that effect behind the stage. The sound system is knackered and so is everything else, but the atmosphere is electric and the crowd dig us. There are a lot of freaks in the audience and we feel at home. I ask them if oral sex is really illegal in Georgia. The answer is a resounding "YES!". What's wrong with America? You can't drink in the street. You can't drink until you're 21. You can't drive fast and now you can't have oral sex. It seems like the powers that be don't want the populous to do anything that might possibly be any fun. I don't get it. All these things are society's pressure release valves. You block up all the valves and you get 'leakage'.
This tour is a slew of 'leakage', an environmental disaster. Send in Greenpeace.
After the show I watch the kids play hackie in the street. It's so humid in Georgia. They must be dying. I meet a guy with a green Pitchshifter eye tattooed on the back of his neck (see pic) and then sneak off to the bus after signing a few autographs and shaking a few hands. We'll be glad to come back to Atlanta. I like it here. My problem isn't Atlanta. My problem >is the bus. The new bus is exactly the same as the last one. Same plush interior, same couches and TVs.
The problem is it's identity. It is definitely a dolphin. The last bus was a purple shark and the light blue of this bus just makes it a dolphin. I tried hard to believe it was something else, something more impressive, something that would look cool when I refered to it in the tour diary. A stingray, an eel or a killer whale. But there's no escaping it. I've been deluding myself. The new bus is ocean blue with a big wave-like swirl on the side and there's a big dome on the front of the roof (where a dolphin's nose hump would be) for the satellite. We are cruising the highways to the apocalypse in a giant cuddly dolphin. Flipper's porno circus. Help us.
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